“They’re coming to help you get Barbara!” – Johnny, Nights the Living Dead (1968)
Great news, dear readers!
You’ve got a decent shot at surviving the zombie apocalypse.
Some people possess a better shot than the others, because we’ve guaranteed a survival team and hired roles, created a meeting place and detailed exit strategy, identified our use of a cache of weapons…
Gasp! It’s not necessary these essentials in position, don’t panic!
Even individuals individuals who foolishly don’t take the inevitable zombie apocalypse seriously, have no fear! You have many skills that will be handy once the undead rise.
You’re ingenious. Excelling with limited sources. Rationing the very best of that which you have. You’re as ingenious as zombies are relentless.
You share ideas. Fundraisers are well known for discussing – and stealing – ideas. It’s recognized and accepted. When only pockets of humanity remain alive, we fundraisers is going to be facilitating, dialoging and consensus-building like nobody’s business.
You realize what’s working. Bonuses for individuals people in direct marketing. We know how valuable it’s to understand very rapidly the things that work and just what sucks. So when we’ve designed a mistake, we’ll receive the hell from dodge while lawyers are rethinking, accountants are recalculating, mechanics are fixing…oh, see that. Critical there was a time wasted. Description of how the really are a tasty zombie lunch.
You’re know when you should shut up. Requesting a present, dealing with volunteers, solicitors, board people – we’re experts at listening, but mostly which means we all know when you should shut the heck up. Zombies are attracted to noisy humans. That may be your neighbour, getting his brain eaten while you’re siphoning his gas.
You need to do your homework. Prospect research, practicality studies… simply visiting your mailbox or perhaps your inbox and you’re gaining apple every moment of each and every day. And we’ll very rapidly identify all of the ways in which we are able to confuse the undead, buying you you precious moments to flee. They’re not able to go swimming. They’re terrible with weapons or tools of any type. They’ve limited convenience of learning. Be honest, you’ve just performed out multiple survival scenarios.
You respect your competitors. Nothing worse than your wise decision getting scooped by another organization. You have to admit that there’s something to respect about zombies. No fundraising event would underestimate an undead foe. They’ll never, ever stop clawing, crawling to access our tasty, tasty brains – we all know they’ll continue coming. Distraction? Won’t work. Logic? Won’t work. We’ll survive because we’ll never doubt their relentlessness.
You’re emotional. You develop gut reactions. Visceral responses. Laughter. Tears. Anger. You know tales that strike emotional guitar chords. Even though these can not focus on the zombie lizard brain, they can help you within our connections along with other humans.
“The world we all know is finished, but keeping our humanity? That’s an option.” Dale, The Walking Dead, Season 2